Sunny and fairly pleasant, Opening Day on the OCAGA Tour was by far, one of the best in recent history. The size of the gallery was unlike what anyone has ever seen.
Don St George dominated the field on opening day of the OCAGA Tour winning Sand Barrens by 6 strokes over second place finisher Charlie Ranucci. Posting a sweet 91 on the Scorecard, one of the lowest gross scores on the day, coupled with a 28 handicap, gave Don a net 63.
In an exclusive interview with Mike O’Brien at the Irish Pub the OCAGA Investigative Reporter learned that despite an obvious “nervous” shake during putting, St George was remarkably accurate displaying admirable concentration, oblivious to “Catcalls” from the gallery. Numerous verbal castigators from the gallery accused St George of calling in the Lexi Thompson “misplaced ball” a day after the incident leading her to a 4 stroke penalty. Ob was asked for an opinion and he quickly replied, “Absolutely it was not Don! He is a perfectionist and would have called immediately and most likely was out practicing when the incident occurred!” Adding credence is the fact that Don St George has arguably the strongest work ethic on the tour, known to hit hundreds of ball every day. By finally moving up to the senior tees he has shown he is in the competition for a return trip to the final four.
Of course, we asked about Don’s real age, because of his remarkable health, health which the St George Medical Center is marketing to the public. Their advertisements, perhaps funded by Citizens United, suggest that Don may actually be well over 90 or 100, which O’Brien did not deny. The Investigative Reporter uncovered a remarkable set of coincidences. The St George Medical Center in rural, St George, South Carolina, supposedly named after Don, is in a “sister town” of Abkhazia which is just north of Georgia proper in the Russian Empire. Abkhazia has one of the highest populations of Centenarians in the world! You decide!
Meanwhile, Scotty Shawlenski was reelected to the OCAGA Presidency in a landslide vote at the OCAGA Banquet. He has replaced Phil Stocker as the “Greatest President in the History of the OCAGA Tour. Stocker was unsuccessful in his bid to allow movement in league play up to the forward tees. Some say it is the reason he did not run for another term of office. Shaw, who gives Stocker credit for the idea, made it happen! Of course, the young studs now chant at the Polish American Tavern:
“Scotty Shaw, he’s our Man,
Exuding Presidential Diplomacy, and Remarkable Elan,
yet willing to share beer with any Fan.”*
*If you are having difficulty “singing the chant,” drink several large beers.
The Top 6 finishers all played from the forward tees sending the message that they are able to compete with the “low handicap” big hitters. Ed Borillo and Art Czachorowski finished 3rd and 4th. OB and LZ finished 5th and 6th.
Low Gross score on the day 88 was shared by Big Charlie Ranucci and Young Roger Reed, now sporting the lowest handicap in the league. The English Ale House and the Italian Bistro both had celebration parties starting during the competition.
Mia Bohan returned much to the delight of fans and “most” players. An unconfirmed story at press time was the budding Bruhaha between Club Champion Rob Juliano and Marc Bohan. Supposedly Rob complained that Mia’s presence gives Marc Bohan support and thus an unfair advantage in competition. When Rob’s score was posted (98), supposedly Marc, who had to give him 8 strokes in the competition and also a bundle in the league championship last season, flippantly suggested than Rob is padding his handicap.
On a brighter note, The OCAGA News Blog once again won the Sports Illastrated** award for “Best Sports Publication Reporting Exclusively on the OCAGA Tour.”
**Sports Illastrated is a subsidy of Sanctuary Publication which publishes the OCAGA News Blog
Please make sure you update your handicap often by putting your scores into the system on a regular basis.
SCATS: Roger Reed took 4 ($27.69) in the Handicap Category and 3 ($16.70) in Scratch to take home the lion’s share of money. To save yourself money the English Ale House will take your $8 and give $5 directly to Roger before each tournament., rather than you paying $10 to play in the SCATS. They will give you the SCAT payoff should you beat Roger in the actual competition.
NEXT: PINELANDS May 7th
Ocean City Amateur Golf Association 