Borillo Back and Beautiful

The Godfather was beaming. Rob Juliano was President. Business was booming at the Italian Bistro. The new room with a wall size projection using Goggle Earth, televised the Sunday OCAGA Tour Event. Patrons consumed complementary Fette Biscottate imported fettebiscotte from Italy which they dipped in Chianti, along with complementary Insalada Caprese, a fa insaladaCaprese vorite cold dish for the warm summer days. Everyone was excited with Charlie Ranucci leading in points and Rookie of the Year front runner Dave Kissinger, emerging on the scene. But no one expected to see such dominance by Eddie Borillo and yes, the old folks were telling the youngsters about A Faint Glimmer of Hope.

An afterthought as the 2002 season was coming to a close, VEGAS gave Eddie a Faint Glimmer of Hope to make the Final Four, just 2 points above mathematical elimination with just the Avalon tournament before Championship Sunday. 2000 Champion Bud Campione had already secured a position and 2001 Champion Jim Hustedde was even money to defend his title and slightly favored over Campione for the Championship. Ed Lang Senior who held the lead most of the season, finally had fallen into second place. As soon as they played together in a foursome, Phil Stocker noticed Ed Senior’s tendency to “miss strokes” when reporting scores, and the difference from then on, was dramatic!

There were seven players ahead of Eddie Borillo, including Bob Peterson Jr. who was a “probable,” with 24 more points. Feeling too comfortable, Junior skipped the tournament. Mike Lazarchick and Bill Russel, already out of contention, played their best matches of the season. Art Czachorowski who started the day just ahead of Eddie, took fourth place. Don St George made a valiant effort using only 79 strokes, playing the last 9, one over par, but 5^th place on the day was just not good enough. Eddie Borillo won Avalon and took closest to the pin on 17 for Three Addition Points. It was one of the most exciting tournaments in OCAGA History. He captured the fourth slot in the final four just beating out Junior and Don St George. The finals were anticlimatic. While Hustedded managed to keep it marginally close during the front nine, it was really all about Eddie Borillo who set a modern day Championship record beating second place finisher Bud Campione by 10 strokes.

Yeah, the Italian Bistro erupted into a delirious frenzy as 2018 Ramblewood Tournament unfolded. Eddie dropped par, four out of the first seven holes. He was not driving with the distance he had during his prime, but he was hitting fairway after fairway, getting to the greens fairly consistently in regulation. He had a hiccup on 8 and 9, finishing the front with a couple of triple bogies. When the patrons looked at the numbers at the turn, low handicappers Roger Read, Scotty Shaw and Mike Lazarchick had each posted 40. Eddie’s 45 elicited a rousing cheer.

While lessor competitors might have folded, falling deeply into a hole of despair, cycling uncontrollably in a growing chasm of negative phantasm, smothered by casuistry, specious thoughts, Ed Borillo grew stronger. After 4 straight bogeys to open the last 9, he dropped a Par and a Birdie, then coasted to the finish line with more bogeys. He held off Roger Read for a 3 strokes victory.

Purportedly, the 18th Marquess of Winchester was visiting the English Pub. Patrons were rejoicing while watching Roger Read place the lowest Gross on the Scorecard (80). Now only 10 points off the lead, the race to the final four is clearly up for grabs. Add Rookie of the Year contender, Milt Nicholas finishing 5^th in the tournament, moving up to 5^th in overall points and you have a big celebration formula. The Marquess brought Proper Job and Thornbridge Jaipur, Indian Pale Ales, for everyone to toast to the quality of their Tour contingent.

Bruno asked the Godfather if the patrons were correct that we are witnessing the end of the Polish era on the OCAGA Tour. They are clamoring about Art Czachorowski no longer choosing to attend events, apparently globetrotting with a bevy of women in pursuit. Art,

Ecuador?

a cherished “dance partner” at the Crab Trap, was last photographed by Paparazzi in South America. Stanislaw at the Tavern was unable to explain Czak’s implemented 5 tournament Handicap System other than reading about a quote from Pierre at Le Petite Café about the “Bohan Effect,” which has Shaw and Lazarchick with handicaps so low that they are marginally competitive if they do not break 80. There is now a growing movement questioning what really happened to Richie Antczak sending a chill of fear throughout the Polish Girl Scout Troops. What kind of system keeps Bob Sweiderk in last place? It there tampering from the Russian Federation?

President Juliano, who purportedly said that the Shawlinski presidency was the worst ever in history, might be sending e-mails directly out to Tour Players and has been accused of changing his mind when Fact Checking comes into play. Speculation from the Bistro Patrons included the imminent demise of Lazarchick, perhaps out of the loop, and maybe having too close of ties with the “Liberal” press. The following e-mail was circulating:

Robert Juliano <jules036@comcast.net>
To:Lazarchick, Mike
August 1 at 2:11 AM
Hey Mike,

I was looking over the handicaps for Mays Landing and there are 3 mistakes you made. Mark should be at a 13, Ed B should be a 27 and Charlie is a 21. You are not accurate nor are you performing in a timely manner. I deliver Real information, not the Fake News you send to the OCAGA Blog. I am the first President not afraid to tell the truth and everybody loves me.

Rob

*****

Juliano of course seemed to personally benefit from the Handicap System he administers, coming in third, moving him significantly up in overall contention, one win away , so to speak!

RACE TO THE FINAL FOUR

74 Ranucci, Charlie
73 Lazarchick, Michael
73 Ruth, Paul
71 Kissinger, Dave
70 Nicholas, Milt
69 Shaw, Scott
64 Read, Roger
62 Hamm, Glenn
62 Bohan, Marc
57 St George, Don
56 Borillo, Ed
53 Juliano, Rob
53 Czachorowski, Art
53 Swanson, Andy
52 O’Brien, Mike
42 Stocker, Phil
40 Sweiderk, Bob

It is unconfirmed that our President is aware of what psychologist call the “Illusion of Truth Effect.” Whether or not something is a lie or the truth, if it is said enough , people begin to believe it is true. The Investigative Reporter is pursuing this story. When Juliano was contacted for comment, he said something to the effect that this is the closest Race to the Final Four in the History of the OCAGA Tour, proving that “I am the ONE making OCAGA Great Again,” and he, not Shaw, is the first to ever use the slogan!

Disclaimer: OCAGA News is not responsible for inaccurately reported information, spelling mistaks or grammaticaly incorrect sentense or paragraphical contructions and will only print stories with permission of the depicted subjects or someone who knows the depicted subject.

SCATS No SCATS were reported to the press for the Golden Pheasant Tournament. Even though Borillo and Juliano normally do not play SCATS, it was reported that they won SCATS at Ramblewood. The OCAGA News Blog can only report what is sent by the Secretary and is not responsible for the distribution of funds.

NEXT MAYS LANDING August 19th